


Do Not Listen to Tsukishima Kei™

by fubuki_ice



Category: Haikyuu!!
Genre: April Fools Day Fic, Crack, Humor, Love Confessions, M/M, Prompt Fic, a lot of thoughts from tsukki, kind of, prompt credits to imaginecrackhaikyuu, tsukki being a little shit despite wanting kagehina to be canon
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-04-01
Updated: 2018-04-01
Packaged: 2019-04-16 22:37:13
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,899
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14174853
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/fubuki_ice/pseuds/fubuki_ice
Summary: Tsukishima Kei, also known as Tsukishima 'Cupid' Kei, is here to bring the two volleyball dorks together with a twist of his, as usual.Tutoring sessions went from an enumeration of English vocabularies to a help in confessing.





	Do Not Listen to Tsukishima Kei™

Tsukishima haven’t been gladder to volunteer-no, more like _forced_ , to become both the King and the Shrimp’s temporal tutor in order to get them to the training camp in Tokyo as a complete team.

It was pretty funny, actually, to hear Hinata asking him to help them study, despite him being reluctant of the idea in the first place. He really couldn’t care less about them when he’s going to pass his exams in one go- _okay_ , maybe their team desperately needed the freak duo in order to score points, but it’s not like he was obliged to help them, right? He couldn’t understand why his captain is such a dad sometimes.

He persistently agreed with his trail of thoughts, until Kageyama, the King, actually begged (in this case, he only shouted, but just let him have his own way, please.) for his help alongside with the short middle blocker who asked with proper manners again. How could he refuse them further, really? It would be interesting to see how much of a simpleton they are and it wouldn’t harm him personally, other than sacrificing his precious free time, of course. He needed his music to live.

As if to prove his point, Kageyama at some point complained about his obvious lack of knowledge (Did he even have any in the first place?) in English words because of being a Japanese, and their captain simply tested him the names of hand gestures in volleyball that ended up being recited correctly within the span of twenty seconds, which proved that there was still hope for the poor setter who absorbed volleyball for three meals a day. 

Tsukishima almost wanted to groan about how his time being put into teaching both of them English, as well as other subjects in the club room had been increasing day by day, until Hinata scrambled outside saying that he desperately needed the toilet and Tsukishima actually caught sight of the King’s heartfelt, almost sorrowful gaze onto the leaving figure- _wait… heartfelt, and the King belonging in one sentence? Ick!_

He shook his head in disgust, ignoring Yamaguchi’s confused look upon him. He knew that their relationship wasn’t any of his business and yet, he felt like their current stance was never going to advance any further than bickering teammates on the court, which _kind of _riled him for some apparent reason. Maybe it’s just that their voices were too loud most of the time, that’s all.__

_Welp_ , guess he’s going to do something about that odd duo that couldn’t recognize their mutual feelings in a helpless attempt. Someone better give him Cupid as his middle name now. 

__“Oi, King.”_ _

__“Huh?” Kageyama immediately looked up from burying in his notes in a moment ago, expression clearly went from neutral to irritated. “What do you want?”_ _

Tsukishima began speaking, with his head propped up on an elbow, smirking. “You want to know another way to say I love you to Hinata in English?” 

_“Tsukki!”_ Yamaguchi whispered in his ear hastily, but he paid him no mind. 

“Yeah sure.” The jet-black haired setter replied without hesitation, until blinking slowly in realization, widening eyes pointing at golden brown ones. _“What?”_ His brows furrowed. “Who said I was in love with that dumbass?” 

“You didn’t, but the fact that you always stare at him with a death grin you hopelessly tried to fix already raised my suspicion.” Hearing that, Kageyama could only stay silent with redness on his cheeks, glaring daggers at him. That jerk! Tsukishima chuckled with an amused look, continuing, “Also, _as long as I’m here, you’re invincible?_ How romantic, when I’ve first heard it.” 

_God_ , he couldn’t believe that what he said originally to give Hinata a sense of pride for being a decoy could be interpreted into something like this. He huffed, looking at their only teammate that wore glasses with an unimpressed face. Truth be told, he did like Hinata, maybe a little- _no_ , scratch that, make that _love_ instead. His irresistible charisma that drives the team’s motivation whenever he presents, the fact that he was always able to bring a new light to his skills where Kageyama least expected it and countless moments where they raced against each other and yelling for him to toss with a dorky, hopeful smile on his face, were all too…unrealistic. Despite Hinata being dumb at everything else and sucked at receives, he might’ve found himself stumbling his way through the middle blocker’s embrace ever since their first encounter. 

“…Just shut up and teach me then!” His gaze flickered downwards to his opened notebook, somewhat hopeful as he sulked in defeat. 

“Whatever the King desires, I’ll follow.” Tsukishima said, lips tugging upwards in triumph. He took the notebook so that it was faced only towards him and Yamaguchi, and scribbled the sentence on the blank space swiftly as a clean block. 

The middle blocker had to try so hard to resist his urge to laugh aloud and prevent himself from imagining a scenario where he could tease at the duo from saying that to each other, because it was obviously going to be a prank in the first place and he was sure that he’s going to enjoy it nonetheless. 

As soon as Yamaguchi caught sight of his childhood friend’s first ever ‘helpful’ advice, he couldn’t help but splutter, covering his mouth immediately as his body trembled for several seconds. 

“ _Tsukki_ , p-please tell me you’re kidding.” He whispered with chuckles spilling in between. 

_Hinata, you are fucking trash._ Was what was written on Kageyama’s notebook.

“ _Oh_ , you bet I am. At this, of course.” Tsukishima answered, quiet enough to not be overheard by the setter with a smile that seemed too innocent in Yamaguchi’s point of view, and handed in the notebook with both hands, looking relaxed. 

“Find a moment to talk to him, whenever you want, I don’t care.” He said, acting as if he wasn’t bothered by their future conversation that he’s definitely going to spy on later. “I included the pronunciations so that you wouldn’t have to ask me every ten seconds.” 

Before the setter’s brain could even process the fact that everything was too suspicious and express his gratitude to the blond middle blocker, Hinata busted his way through the door showing guiltiness in his face. 

“Sorry I took too long! What did I miss?” 

“Nothing, dumbass. We were waiting for you.” 

“Huh, why-“ 

“Stop wasting my time and let’s get this done for.” With Tsukishima’s usual straightforward tone without missing a beat, their tutoring session in the club room continued soon after that.  
\--------------------------- 

“Hinata.” 

“Huh?” Hinata looked up from his duffel bag, blinking. 

“Can you, uh-stay here for a while? I have something to say to you.” Kageyama asked softly, still gazing over his notebook. 

He tiled his head in confusion, but eventually nodded in approval with a smile. “Sure!” 

“So…what did you want to tell me?” His bright, hopeful smile continued to stay on his face, as he stared at those striking blue eyes in anticipation, somewhat shuffling his feet to smooth the awkwardness between their momentary silence. 

_Well, here goes my success._ The blond middle blocker smirked to himself, hiding behind a row of lockers while containing his inner chuckles at the pit of his stomach. He never expected that out of everybody, the King would actually believe that what he wrote was going to be sincere, not to mention his reputation to him wasn’t exactly great. Did Kageyama really wanted to impress Hinata that much? If he was the setter, he would’ve went for those three simple words in a heartbeat, consider how they’re both simpletons, duh. 

“Hinata, I, no.” The jet-black haired setter shook his head when he stammered with his words, taking a deep breath to regain his voice. “Y-You’re fucking trash!” 

Tsukishima covered his mouth as tightly as he could, trying to suppress his laugh from the serious tone of the King’s voice. _Oh my god._ His back was slouched onto the locker as he could feel his entire figure trembling while his other hand flew to his stomach, clenching tightly, almost unable to breathe from the impact as he shut his eyes tightly to restrain from letting out even a gasp that would allow them to caught him being here spying. _I can’t believe this-_

_“What?”_ Hearing Kageyama speak in English for the first time, not to mention this accurate, left him in an utter shock, and pure amazement. “Kageyama, w-what do you mean?” 

“I-I don’t know, but Tsukishima said that i-it means I love you in English, so…” Kageyama trailed off, with redness painted on his face, rubbing the back of his neck awkwardly. 

Hinata’s mouth went agape from the response, eyes widening like he had just received the perfect toss (To be honest, it was always perfect, but still) from the setter. _A confession right at the bat?! That was unexpected, coming from Kageyama…_ “W-What? Then…uh, I-“ He tried thinking back what he had said earlier with lips pursing into a thin line. He tried opening his mouth for several times, trying to recite from memory, “Kageyama, you’re fucking trash too!” The moment those words left his lips, those eyes of his reflected the passion he have for the setter, not to mention his undying feelings that could not be expressed until now. 

“Really?” 

“Yeah!” 

After regaining his breath, Tsukishima tried to look at their reactions from the corner of his eye while continued to hide and he almost couldn’t help splutter when he spot the freak duo hugging their lives out of them with a content expression on their faces. _I-Is the King smiling like an actual human being?_ A crease had formed between his eyebrows as he squinted to get a better look and almost gagged (internally) when he realized his suspicion was true. _Ugh_ , he thought, unable to accept the fact that the setter actually looked acceptable and bearable for once. 

He shook his head again, scratching it in annoyance. Now that everything was going like he expected- but not the last part, he didn’t have the heart to tell them that those words that were supposed to express love as a more creative way were in fact an insult, not to mention having a swear word in between. 

As much as he wanted for both the King and the Shrimp to actually get along and not causing anymore chaos on the court for once, all he hoped for was the Shrimp, specifically, to not call him out on his helpful advice to his upperclassmen in the team.  
\-------------------------------  
“Sugawara-san!” 

“Yes, Hinata?” 

“K-Kageyama and I were officially a couple now!” He chirped, his arms flailing about in excitement. 

“That’s great! I’m glad it worked out for both of you.” Sugawara ruffled his kouhai’s hair to express his motherly instinct. “How, if I may ask?” 

“Oh, I think Kageyama said something like…fucking trash?” Hinata tilted his head as he stumbled with the last two terms in English. He eventually blinked in realization, adding with a smile, “And Tsukishima was the one who taught him that-“ 

_“Oh.”_ His brows soon furrowed into a thin line at the unexpected response, his cheery smile melting off his face that slowly distorted into anger, which definitely went unnoticed by the pure, innocent middle blocker. “I would _definitely_ have to thank him for that.” 


End file.
